Friday, September 23, 2011

*fist pump* Four followers, and how to know NOT to go out in public with that makeup on.

So thanks to the Tuesday blog hop, we have four followers! That's three more than we started with!  Slowly but surely, this wee blogling that is sitting in an ever-present dust cloud of glitter with the faint aroma of Red Bull is being recognized.  Tonight, Pinky, we take over the world! Muahahaha!

So on to the meat and potatoes that our small dinner party likes thus far.  It was requested on the Facebook group 'Makeup for Everyone!' that I do a look with the colors of Raisin Bran. I love Raisin Bran, so I figured, why not, right?  I totes became a cereal killa.  What started out as a tutorial on how to get a semi-dramatic look from some relatively neutral colors became a nightmarish hot mess.  BUT, dear readers, I have risen like a phoenix from the ashes of my Urban Decay 24/7 pencil that the dog ate, and turned it into a bible-like instructional on all the signs that a certain look may not be for you.  On to the show!  It's me! It's me! Top of the Bill!

So, I'm not going to begin with the naked face picture.  You should all know by now that you want to start with a clean, moisturized, sunscreened, dry face.  The Hendersons will all be there with THEIR faces on!

Assemble thine tools!

Now assemble your products!!


Rimmel brown waterproof pencil, Physician's Formula Plentifulll mascara in black-brown, UDPP, NYX Shadow Base in white, Madd Style Cosmetix pigments in Mudd Slinger, Birf'day Suit, Dirty Beats, Glitter and Doom, Young Blood, and Bon Bon Blitz.

Prime those peepers!  Come together!

Pick up some shadow base on your stiff large concealer brush. Right now!

Apply and blend! Over me! Try to avoid getting it in your lashes like I did.  That's what happens when drinkies and tutorials commence together.

I'll be good like I know I should... and line first, once again.  This isn't an always thing, just when you want to have that foundation liner set so you can avoid smudging the work you've done on the top lid.

Using the large pencil brush, pick up some Mudd Slinger.

Apply to entire lid!  Now, HINT #1 that this look is not for you: Your first color brings out a ruddy, sallow, or jaundiced look to your skin.  See how my face suddenly looks like a red delicious apple?  Yep.  That's a bad thing.

Now, to get a raisin color, I frankened Young Blood, Glitter and Doom, and Bon Bon Blitz together.  I picked it up on my small floofy brush.

And applied it heavily to outer corner and downward from the middle of the crease.  The intention here is to have a good amount of product to blend the front door out of.  HINT #2 that this look is not for you: On top of the first color bringing out the undesirable colors in your skin, the second color brings out another facet of undesirable color flaw in your skin. In my skin, it highlighted the yellow aspect of my normally tan-looking freckles.

Preliminary blending.  Not. So. Awesome. ^ Irritated Jalackie makes snarly face.

You can see here how it's been well blended into the Mudd Slinger, and up crease on to the bottom of my orbital bone.  Holy Cheddar Crackers, it looks like someone nailed me with an awesome left hook! With every mistake, we must surely be learning?

Still, my makeup brush gently weeps as I blend it the rest of the way.

Happiness is a warm Dirty Beats.

Here I set the bottom liner with Dirty Beats, and then lined the top lash line with Dirty Brats, pulling it down to meet the bottom liner and follow the curve of the raisin color.

Somewhere in her style that shows me, where we blended out the liner.  I also softened the topmost part of the raisin and highlighted with Birf'day Suit. HINT #3 that this look is not for you: Accentuating a tired, red-eyed, bleary look that you make already have going on, or creating one to begin with. Wow, Jalackie, do you need to get by with a little help from your friends, pillow and blanket?

Final blended look - now, I have a strict three strikes policy.  We have our three strikes.  However, in this picture we actually have a FOURTH strike.  HINT #4 that this look isn't for you: In spite of pulling forward all of your flaws, it seems to melt and blend into your face, with no real definition.

Could it be anybody?  Yep, anybody who has no idea that they should never have left their mirror, let alone their house, with that look.  Especially us with the spex... Mousy, timid librarian, anyone?

I WANT YOU... I WANT YOU SO BAAAD, IT'S DRIVIN' ME MAD, DON'T WEAR MAKEUP THAT LOOKS BAD!

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